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最終更新日 : 2012/01/30 (Mon) 06:15
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We don\'t make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.
I\'ve always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you\'ve got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn\'t your biggest problem.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.
Humor is just another defense against the universe.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.
UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
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The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
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You can pretend to be serious; you can\'t pretend to be witty.
The right to swing my fist ends where the other man\'s nose begins.
C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language
The only difference between me and a madman is that I\'m not mad.
Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!
Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.
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Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
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I\'m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let\'s start with typewriters.
I don\'t even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
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Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
If there?s one thing I know it?s God does love a good joke.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
Comedy is nothing more than tragedy deferred.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
The trouble with the Internet is that it\'s replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
My last cow just died, so I won\'t need your bull anymore.
If you can read this you\'re not aiming in the right direction.
Is your argument that the Creator of the Universe was working under a deadline and His manager forced Him to rush inefficient designs into production?
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What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.
Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
Science is what people understand well enough to explain to a computer. All else is art.
If it wasn\'t for muscle spasms, I wouldn\'t get any exercise at all.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
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He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.
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Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
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Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
A man can\'t get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I\'ve only ever had one.
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
Write a wise word and your name will live forever.
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
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To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
I don\'t even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?
To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
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It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
It\'s impossible to experience one\'s death objectively and still carry a tune.
Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn\'t it.
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I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
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Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
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A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, \'Don\'t you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?\' I said \'I didn\'t know there were any witnesses. Now I\'ll have to kill you too\'.
Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.
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Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
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In this war ? as in others ? I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
A man can\'t get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
Lohr\'s Law: The future is merely the past with a twist ? and better tools.
I\'m not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It\'s just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.
My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate.
If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn\'t over until everyone gets their cookies.
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Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they\'re yours.
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So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said \'You\'ve been promoted\'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said \'You\'ve been promoted again\'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said \'You\'re managing director.\' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said \'What happened to you?\' And I Said \'I careered off the road.\'
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.
A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn\'t over until everyone gets their cookies.
A man can\'t get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.
Silence is argument carried out by other means.
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
I don\'t want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.
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It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn\'t cure.
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Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
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It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
The worst barbarity of war is that it forces men collectively to commit acts against which individually they would revolt with their whole being.
I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT\'S relativity.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
Humor is just another defense against the universe.
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The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
Heav\'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn\'d, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn\'d.
Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.
When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.
People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
Yes, I\'m fat, but you\'re ugly and I can go on a diet.
Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
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Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
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Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It\'s the transition that\'s troublesome.
Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question
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I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.
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He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
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Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
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Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
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A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.
What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
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About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
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Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air ? however slight ? lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.
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Write a wise word and your name will live forever.
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Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.
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Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.
I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT\'S relativity.
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The perfect computer has been developed. You just feed in your problems and they never come out again.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/17/(Tue) 14:10
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